Now past my 70th birthday, I feel I have never felt comfortable in my skin and that I have somehow spent life in an ill-fitting suit. A true cynic, I feel that, as far as life is concerned, I have always been on the wrong side of every door. I have been likened by many to ‘Eeyore’.
Socially awkward and cripplingly shy, I am a natural wallflower. Consequently, in any social setting, I find myself trapped in a corner behind groups of people who are chatting away happily but showing no intention of ever including me.
The title ‘Malcontent’ suits me well.
Recently, I have been forcing myself to get out and about more as I was becoming very insular. I have therefore joined a local U3A where I go to play Mah Jong for two hours a week. I played this with my wife back in the 80s but hadn’t played since. I’m now really enjoying getting to know it again. Still with the U3A, I’m investigating the possibility of running one or two groups/courses next academic year.
I’ve also started playing Canasta with friends for a couple of hours during the week. A new skill acquired, though I’m still learning.
I replied to an advert on FB from the local library asking for a volunteer ‘digital champion’. (Their phrase, not mine. I have no desire to be nominally linked with a wonder horse.) I now spend four hours a week in the library helping people with their IT queries. It’s a chance to meet some lovely people and the library is a very welcoming environment. I always enjoy the hour the pre-schoolers spend singing songs and nursery rhymes during the time I’m there. Remember the days of the ‘shh-ing’ librarian? They are no more.
I continue to quiz in the Winter quiz league and, of course, I continue to sing with my church choir. I will notch up 30 years’ service come October.
I’ve made some more friends, and I am becoming a little more sociable. Maybe the malcontent is beginning to thaw just a little.
I was for many years a secondary school master teaching English, though I was known to turn my hand to other subjects. This blowing on the board rubber was an accustomed action of mine back in the day. I never did get used to dry-wipe markers. Interactive whiteboards came in just before I went into early retirement, so I never really used one.
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